Top Chef

I'm not a food critic by any means
and will not attempt to become one in this post
at most
this is a mere critique
based on appearance
presentation and taste
doubt anyone can relate
and it all starts from the first date
i suggest you be picky about where and what you eat
that's quite rare in this day
people are eating McDonald's, Burger King, and Wendy's
i don't like my food fast
or too slow
or had before
i favor a nice seat, quaint atmosphere
take my time and make it worth time spent
some place with a style
a bit edgy
attracts big crowds
but not everyone is let in
i want the only reservation
spotless table
la perla lace setting
OBGYN clean
so there
I could eat anywhere
although there's isn't any eating utensil's
before indulging
the smell entraps my nose
trace the outside like a stencil
with my tongue and lips
slowlyfrom the base of the plate
to the top
neat freaking
so none falls
nothing spills as I sip
down my cheeks
as it drips
food turns me on
long for it's flavors
savor each
from this particular chef
have it delivered
sit in
take out
whatever
praying the taste never leaves my lips
dance on my tongue's tip
mastication masturbation
no condom
as much I desire intellect
this isn't as complex
simply taste bud sex
marriage between food and mouth
until climatic divorce
like parting lips
after a sensual kiss
i miss it
please don't leave... 
my face
too delicious to give up
too scrumptious to be late
too delectable to let waste
unless this is a race
I'm going turtle pace
then accelerate
I was told I eat fast
but when its so good
i crave seconds and thirds
sometimes...
until whispers turn into loud words
only commands, adjectives, and verbs
are sufficient to describe
this palate
or mine
tastefully divine
particular
where i choose
always left satisfied
and I satisfy
this diner replied 
the chef
kept my mouth watering
tongue wet 
unique ingredients
just right
left
me wanting more
phenomenal 
promise to
keep the recipe a secret if she tells me
or come back
again
and again
and again
and again
price... less
gratuity would not suffice
french the cook
rave reviews
eat til I'm full
face turns blue



compliments to..

No Assembly Required

If there was a user safety guide
Mine would be full of intriquet lies
All safety and operating instructions should be read before used
Retained in a secure place when frequently abused
Heed warnings, and adhere to all
I should not be used unless you're equipped to fall... deeply in love and hate
Situated away from the heat
Unless in a moment of passion or agruement connected to my heart at all times
Until broken or stepped on
Lied to or crept on
Clean with a dry stare and make believe
Care should be taken
Otherwise let me drop and let deviousness and deciet spill into my openings
service me at your own discretion... or mine
(Cunning wink of my eye)
When:
My titinium reinforced power-supply has been damaged
When your lies have filled my apertures
I've ben exposed to countless melancholy days
When I appear not to operate or change in my performance
Literally and figuratively cold in a sense
This product may contain dents
love struck, hence
Empty pens
Broken pencils
Crumbled paper
Over worked and labored
Straight face and seldom blinks
Long eyelashes and tattoo ink
Angel hair, a big nose
Van sneakers, fitted clothes
Poets lies and big brown eyes
Intellectual and intelligent
Sexual
Doesn't calculate time spent
Kind
My love is hellen keller blind
Not deaf
Hears and remembers, yet
Very forgiving
Never forgets
Durable and enduring but with a catch
You have to have the up most respect
Operates best when you're wet
Banana appeal and well kept
Too honest and often bold
An unheld tongue
And when captivated, you are the only one
Although when mishandled
Turns cold as the titanium casing
You couldn't warm with love candles
And when ties are severed
Its gone, lost, finished, not The End
...The Forever
No need to squint
Just follow the instructions
There's no fine print
No warranty or return policy
just don't mention
Covet my privacy
So if your ready to purchase
aim at the target and shoot it
batteries not  included